Friday, June 7, 2013

Marriage Files #103: Thought Patterns

One of the things I've been struggling with is changing my thought patterns.  I know I'm a wife and totally committed to my marriage, but I still haven't changed my name.  I've started the paperwork, but haven't finished it.  Why?  Normally, I like to get stuff over with so it's not sitting on my "To-Do" list - so why can't I just get this done?

Then, my husband and I still have separate finances.  Money is such a hard subject for me.  I've been extremely poor at times and have worked so hard to be where I am that even though I know it's ridiculous, I struggle with turning over everything to a joint fund.  To be fair, my husband hasn't asked me to, but in my heart - I know that's what's probably best.  I just, once again, can't quite get there.

The problem, I think, is that for all that we happily live as a couple, make decisions together, and have joined our schedules and futures - I still think like a single person on certain topics.  Part of me keeps struggling not to lose my own identity as I become part of a new creation. 

I'm not entirely certain what to do in this situation except continue to work on it and pray about it, but I'm sure I'm not the only person who has entertained the same struggles.  So, here's me reaching out, if you have advice or thoughts - feel free to send them my way.

To my wonderful husband, I continue to thank you for your patience and willingness to let me figure things out as we go along. 

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